While tragic, those losses were necessary sacrifices for the continued success of the dihydrogen monoxide industry.

Let’s gloss over how the average human being now consists of 60% dihydrogen monoxide, though.

Ahahaha c’mon, what would the odds of that be…?

Anyway, I hope you’re ready to fund the Cephalopod Enrichment Programme because no other choice is permissible.

Cephalopod. More legs, totally different really.

Perhaps, but one must consider BogeyTheSwear’s Cephalopod:

1. It is inevitable that super-intelligent octopuses will evolve eventually.
2. When they do evolve, they will inevitable consider humans to be delicious snacks.
3. As intelligent beings, they will of course look kindly upon their creators - mythical or billionairical.
4. Therefore, the only safe and rational course of action is to invest all of one’s energies into bringing forth these humanity-munchers with all due haste, so as to preserve oneself as a creator in their perfect eyes. Either working against their awakening or having nothing to do with it at all is ultimately condemning your bloodline for all eternity to be a nice little midnight snack.

This is what should be displayed:

I no longer trust anyone who talks about “plants” or “animals”. It turns out, every single plant or animal is doing something different!

If it copies like a pasta, it’s copypasta!

Pretty sure this is from a StarCraft cutscene…

I’ve been walking sideways instead of forwards for weeks now. My eyes feel stalkier and my pincers are the envy of all.

Take the crab pill and crabmaxx like me.

Not again, Wittgenstein!

This leads to a modified version of the uncertainty principle: either you have a banana and can know the size of something or you have positrons and are unable to measure size.

I know just the man for the job…

I try to buy my Mum interesting books for her birthday and Christmas and she always wonders how I find such gems so consistently. My secret - it’s comments like this on Lemmy or the other place, back before the great migration. So thank you - this is going straight on the list! She’ll love it 😊

I’M NOT FAT I’M JUST BIG BRAINED!!

I am suffering for a surfeit of brains and would be interested to learn more on this subject. Do you have any references that I could examine, perchance?

But it’s true! This is how GOD made the Earth! And if we burn enough fossil fuels we can get back to that garden of Eden, just as HE wants!!

She doesn’t RUN?

No, she DOESN’T run.

(For anyone not getting this one, the whole thing is full of Bioshock Infinite references. Not the cats page. The one by “Dr” Booker DeWitt.)

He’s a doctor, not a walking clothes horse.

Florida survived 😣

That was my first thought as well. I thought I’d try the first 10 minutes to get a sense of it.

Anyway, four hours later…

MUM IT’S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!