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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: August 5th, 2023

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  • No one teaches you how to have a relationship. So people just kind of default into patterns that are often toxic.

    It’s why taking a step back and being deliberate about how to communicate is so important. There needs to be a shared understanding and deliberateness about how to intentionally communicate.

    And it needs to be something that applies equally to everyone involved. No copouts, no special circumstances that only go one way, there need to be firm, hard rules with specific consequences that apply evenly to all involved that are arrived at communally, and not unilaterally.


  • It takes two to tango.

    The defensive lashing out type stuff happens because he hasn’t established firm boundaries around it. And she’s probably lashing out about stuff because… Well. Doesn’t matter, really.

    There need to be firm boundaries about how to have a discussion that apply evenly to both of them. Both of them need to buy into these rules. When the lines are crossed the discussion ends.

    This isn’t about shutting down a discussion but having the awareness to recognize constructive versus destructive discussions.

    Setting reasonable, adult boundaries and rules, sticking to them, and establishing that certain behaviours are problematic are the only way this gets better.

    If she’s unable to recognize her own defensiven ss as a problem and work on it all of this falls apart but having the framework in place will allow transparency into the why of it.











  • Like. I can’t even rub Wayland on my 4090. Its a black screen. This happens with manjaro kde. With mint I can at least see my (frozen, unresponsive, unusable) desktop.

    This all sounds cool and stuff but I kind of wish people would, like, shut the fuck up about Wayland? My understanding is that NY experience.is far from unique. People that own PCs have nvidia cards. Unless “the year of the Linux desktop” involves everyone vaporating anmd cards that magically have cuda cores somehow out of their asses then nothing about Wayland really matters to us.

    You can “get an and” card to me all you want, but here’s the thing: I don’t fucking want one. I use my cuda cores. Its why I spent as much as I did on a 4090.

    I guess 555 is supposed to make Wayland work with nvidia?

    I mean, look. Using an nvidia card with Linux, and getting the requisite drivers working, can be am experience akin to having your has deferens ripped out by an aging badger. I get it. But until I can nvidia while I Wayland I just don’t care. And I’m not alone.





  • Fungah@lemmy.worldtoScience Memes@mander.xyzAutism
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    2 years ago

    Sometimes objects im using have like, a personality and desire? Like they won’t want to get thrown out or there’s some kind of relationship between two forks.

    Its kind of subconscious - I’m only somewhat aware of it. Its weird.

    Also when in recalling things Ive learned recently I’ll sometimes recall a place I’ve been to as well. This happens most frequently with code for some reason. Programs I’ve written or functions will be strongly tied to places in some way? I don’t get it.



  • Fungah@lemmy.worldtoScience Memes@mander.xyzWe're all a little crazy
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    2 years ago

    I read… Something once and they suggested the past we may have collectively possessed a more direct relationship with rekigi9n like you’re talking about. That for some reason or another we don’t tend to “hear the voice of hod” like we once did. Out relationship with our internal self had changed. Maybe it was bred out by our tendency to kill the religious folks who disagree the most with whatever the dumpster jour religion at the time is.